It appears the world needs some light and entertaining reading at the moment. So, here are a few anecdotes from the past few years of my driving experience for District 833. As always, the names have been changed to protect the innocent.
One afternoon, as the kindergarten and first graders boarded, I noticed some “coloring” above the lip of one of the boys. As he hit the top step he leaned in and pointed, saying,
"I gave myself a mustache!" (imagine a very harsh, high pitched voice).
Bus driver: "I see that. How'd that happen?"
Boy: "I used a magic marker.”
As he passed by to plant himself directly behind me, a soft, sincere voice came from the seat directly across from him.
Boy 2: "My sister has a mustache." (imagine the “sing song” rising and falling voice of a 5-year-old).
I did everything I could to maintain control, including turning my head, putting my hand over my mouth and pretending like I was looking at something out my side window.
Another afternoon, a fifth grade girl boarded the bus in the school bus corral exclaiming loudly,
"I can smell snow in the air! It smells like snow!"
Bus driver: "Yeah, bring it on!"
This prompted a long discussion of everyone’s favorite snow activitiy, and what they planned to do in the snow in the days ahead.
At the end of the run, I passed on a reminder of the coming weather to the brother and sister that get off at the last stop,
"It's going to be wet tomorrow, remember to wear your galoshes."
Boy: "What's a 'galosh'?"
BD: "It's another name for a boot to keep your feet dry." Bus driver going old school on the boot terminology.
One afternoon as we were leaving the elementary school lot, the talk was in regard to acronyms like BTW, ATM and such. A couple of the girls were talking about adults using these in conversations. It was funny to hear their take on the older generation. Then one of the girls pipes up,
“My dad says weird stuff. He uses this crackly voice and says ,"Holy Cow!"
BD: “Does he say it like this? "Holy Cow!" I give it my best Harry Caray impression.
Girl: “Yeah! Exactly like that! He doesn't do it very much anymore, but when I was little he did it all the time.”
BD: “Well, that guy was a very famous sports announcer. Is your dad a Chicago Cubs fan?”
Girl: “Yup. And, he always wanted to be a sports announcer when he was young. I think he did announce hockey when he was in college.”
BD: “That's cool. I always wanted to be an announcer too.”
I thought to myself, "Now that's a cool dad.”